‘So Pooja,’ I say,  ‘I’ve been really good. I’ve only had a banana smoothie this morning.’

Pooja looks at me confused. ‘Are we starting our juice fast today?’ she asks.

‘Yes,’ I say, ‘though I am bloody starving and it is only 9.30 am.’

‘Hmm,’ Pooja says.

I look at the plate by her side on which remain two biscuits and a spattering of crumbs.

‘I didn’t know we were starting it today!’ she says by way of explanation.

For a few seconds I feel smug and superior.

Then I walk into the kitchen and start ransacking cupboards.

‘I’m going into town do you want me to get you anything?’ Pooja asks as I stare at the fridge and all the things I can’t eat.

‘ooh, are you going to Bali Buddha?’ I ask, ‘Cos I really fancy some Spanish potato pie.’ I stop. ‘Oh crap. I can’t have that can I? Remind me again what are the rules of this thing? Juice and fruit and vegetables?’ And biscuits?

Pooja thinks for a bit. ‘Maybe we should start this fast thing tomorrow.’

‘But tomorrow we have dance and we’ll need energy for that.’

‘Well how about next week?’

It sounds good, some nebulous time in the future though I’m half aware we have dinner plans on Monday and I’m not prepared to sit and watch others eat sushi whilst I drink a glass of air putih (water). I agree nonetheless and reach for the Pringles deciding simultaneously that a visit to Gaya ice cream might be in order later – Cashew and Gianduja are on the menu after all.

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