5. Cycling. John says cycling up the volcano in Bali. If you recall I cycled DOWN. Except it wasn’t down. So that doesn’t feature on my highlight list. But cycling around the riverfront in Perth does. Because it was flat. 6. Swimming to Palolem Purely because I made it. 7. 12 hour train ride to …
We have seven days before we head back to London. I can’t believe we’ve been away 7 months. It’s been easily the best 7 months of my life so I’m kind of reeling with premature holiday blues whilst also enjoying the best time of the trip so far. Not that it’s over. On the one …
I think I did part 1 back in India and I probably talked about wishing that I’d packed an extra suitcase rammed with Percy Pig fizzy pig tails. Also I think I probably talked about wishing I hadn’t wasted valuable baggage weight by packing three shades of nail polish. My friend Cynthia was right. Even …
The thing about being back in ‘civilisation’ is that it’s quite stressful. The capitalist gene kicks in and everywhere I look I see things I want to buy. Ok, not everywhere I look. When I look in the clothes shops the communist gene kicks back in. But everywhere else I see things I want to …
So it turns out there is a point when the ATM decides to say NO. Or in my case NO. NOW BACK THE HELL AWAY FROM THE TERMINAL, TURN AROUND AND GET OUT. Could be that withdrawing thousands of dollars worth of rupiah (which runs into the billions so high that I can’t even count …
For those of you who don’t know me so well, I use the word ‘dude’ quite a lot. I use it occasionally as a term of endearment as in ‘hey dude’ meaning ‘hello my friend’ but more often I use it in lieu of the words ‘for fuck’s sake’ I figure that by using the …
It starts with a profiterole of happiness. And finishes like this. Food never made me cry before but food made me cry with happiness last night. We went to the only Michelin starred restaurant on the island for a slap up celebration. Once more sartorially I made a statement. This time with my red plastic …
Only in Bali do you hear the words ‘colonic irrigation’ and ‘ecstatic dancing’ in the same sentence. Actually only in Ubud. I told you – it’s like Brighton only on some parallel universe where things are enhanced to the power of 100. I was feeling down, despite the fact I was at the time eating …
‘Mrs Putu will come and get you,’ Natasha says. ‘And lock you in a cage,’ I add. ‘And make you clean her toenails,’ ‘With your tongues,’ Jay completes the image. The three fall silent. Their faces in the candlelight are struck with horror. A lip quivers. I hear a wimper. Maybe we went too far. …
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