‘So for xmas we have two options. If the weather is nice we can go to the beach. And if it’s not we can stay in Ubud and do what xmas is about. Namely eating.’ ‘Actually Christmas is about Jesus,’ John reminds me. I raise an eyebrow at the heathen grinning at me across the …
1. I told Alula for the billionth time that I’m not her slave. And she replied by telling me that I’m not the boss of her either. 2. I awoke at 5am to the sounds of someone breaking into the house. It turned out that it was a giant owl trying to headbutt its way …
I keep starting a lot of my posts with ‘So I was getting a massage and…’ But um, I was getting a massage this morning and Alula wandered in. ‘Hello mummy,’ she said. ‘mgrhrmrmrm,’ I answered. ‘Is it ok if I sit on the bed?’ she asked, clambering on the bed. ‘Yes, ok but you …
The reason for my blogging silence this week has been down to the fact my fingers have been otherwise occupied with pulling dead insects out of my daughter’s hair. At times the three of us have resembled a small troupe of gorillas picking fleas out of each other’s fur. Well John got off. He’s the …
As I was lying on the massage table I started musing on a conversation I had today when I mentioned to someone that I used to be on a senior management team. I had to pause at the time and try to remember the words in the right order. Then I had to shake my …
Things I could do today in Ubud: Learn about Sacred Commerce (but first I’d have to understand what that meant) Join with others in a Galactic and Universal Movement of Consciousness which will bring back Heaven on Earth (but smoking dope here could lead to 500 years hard labour so I’m not sure what the …
Today I introduced a Western evil to the civilised land of Bali. I feel like a Spaniard bringing smallpox to the New World. Except I brought Road Rage and not a disease that will decimate the population. Unless of course everyone starts driving each other off the roads and into the drainage ditches – which …
‘I want you to introduce yourselves and give me one word which describes how you’re feeling now.’ Bored. Can I say bored? No, that’s rude. What about highly sceptical? No, also rude. Resistant? Well if she can read my aura she knows this already. I’ll go with tired. Tired is inoffensive. Oooh crap, my turn. …
So what better reason to break into a five star hotel? Driving up to the valet point in our rusting hunk of metal should have outed us as not that rich but the dudes with the wavy bomb detector things let us on through. They even parked our pringle encrusted car for us (hey I …
Let’s get one thing clear. I’m not American. But I kind of prefer the whole giving thanks idea to the whole big fat man dressed in red, family horror, queen’s speech, overcooked turkey and ooh look more socks day of hell idea. Let’s get another thing clear. I hate Christmas. Always have. I like living …
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